First Post

Life as a University Student Aint that Grand

Chapter 1

People always say, "Go to university it will be one of the best periods of your life." and they are right, BUT with the highs come the lows, and this is what this entry is about.

Many people write about how fun life is at University, they pass over that it is also stressful and manic saying that this will be outshone by the overall experience. But be warned, you can only look at the overall experience once its done and paid off. Only then can you look back and laugh. I'm in the stage where I just want to sitdown and cry.

Why Quitting Aint An Option

1. I've spent 7,000 pounds that I don't have, too much to leave and live with my parents til its paid off. I'd have to pay it all back then try and get on my feet, probably be at home for anything from 2-5 years, I've tasted freedom I couldn't do that it wouldn't be fair on me. And it wouldn't be fair on them.
2. I live in the South of England now with more up market friends. Where as if I go home I will be back with my down market friends, who weren't really that great friends at all when I come to think about it. I have the same caliber of friends as Julius Ceaser except mine are probably easeir to bribe and living in Essex could probably get hold off AK-47's and a couple of Krashnikovs instead of knives. I understand that in this bullet point I have painted a very bleak picture of myself but I have never told anyone that I am a nice guy. I have qualities but I also have negatives as does everyone.
3. What would I do. I mean even if I did go back to Essex.(May I just say to those of you who don't know what essex is like, it has the worst reputation in England of all the Counties. And rightly so. But we'll come back to essex in another entry.) What job would I get? What oppurtunitues would lay ahead?

Why Suicide Aint An Option

1. The most important fact of this argument is that I'm too lazy, thats right lazy is my main factor. Sounds silly but think about it I'd have too find a suitable place suitable materials. Write a letter and stuff. Nah living is much easier.
2. Is there a god, is there a hell. What if I commit suicide and then go to hell, I would really be upset. Much easier to live die of natural causes then see whats on the other side. And even worse than if I went to hell. What if theres nothing on the other side, what if I die and thats it, POP I'm gone. That scares the hell outta me. And from there to the next logical step.
3. Fear, I'm one of the biggest cowards you'll ever see. I say that but sometimes my own either stupidness or bravery has shocked me sometimes. I'm scared of heights I can't stand on a stool without being absolutely scared out of my wits. So how would I jump from a great height.
4. The most silly, I don't want my Brother to get my money or anything of mine. I hate him soooo much. I mean don't get me wrong I love him and I'll always help him when he's in need. But he does my head in and until that moment comes I'd rather stay in a different continent to him, and give him nothing that he could pawn of for drugs, alcohol and cigarettes.
5. Slightly less silly, I don't want to die a virgin.
6. I'm human, I want to live.

So I Guess I better Stay!!

If you have any comments please send them to me much appreciated.